Archive - Ask Angela: Relationship Advice for Love After Trauma

Our traumas got the best of us. How do I break the cycle?

I am in the middle of going through a breakup with my one-year-old baby’s father. It has been a very tumultuous relationship, as we both have our fair…

Aug 13 •

July 2025

He’s a black-and-white thinker. I see the gray. How do we talk?

I want to improve my communication skills. I can't seem to communicate with my husband. I think I need help in fully listening to him and then answering…

Jul 30 •

I want to be a better listener—but I can’t stop interrupting my partner!

I have a habit of listening and interrupting my spouse when she talks, because I feel the need to respond to something she said. How can I move away…

Jul 16 •

After 15 years of gaslighting, how can I be sure I wasn’t the problem?

I’ve learned I was gaslit for 15+ years in my marriage before I left. I was always the problem. Now that I’ve left, how do I know that I’m not that…

Jul 1 •

June 2025

Why won't my partner take emotional responsibility in our relationship?

I’m very much aware of my flaws and shortcomings. How do I convince my spouse or help them realize they also have issues to work through?

Jun 20 •

I grew up with constant fighting. Now I shut down during conflict. How can I work through this?

Growing up with parents fighting constantly has affected me in so many ways. Now, I have the tendency to shut down in difficult conversations. I…

Jun 4 •

April 2025

My spouse and I both have past trauma and poor communication skills. Can we get better together?

Julie writes: If both you and your spouse have past trauma and poor communication skills, is it possible to heal together and learn how to have a better…

Apr 16 •

How do I foster growth in my relationship without my partner’s help?

Jess writes: How do I foster growth in a relationship when the other person is unwilling to put the necessary time aside weekly to communicate openly. I…

Apr 1 •

March 2025

How do I stop being so defensive in my relationship?

Mila writes: “What can I do so that in difficult conversations where my partners raises issues he has with my behavior, I do not directly fall into…

Mar 30 •

February 2025

How do I let go of the hurt from being treated badly by someone I loved?

Halle writes: “How do you release the grief and hurt of being treated badly by someone you cared for deeply?”

Feb 11 •

January 2025

How do I get over trust issues and stop ruining my relationships?

Spencer writes: “I demolish my amazingly beautiful relationship with a gorgeous and devoted girlfriend who showed me unconditional love even though I…

Jan 28 •

I have complex trauma from childhood. How do I learn to love myself?

Mary writes: “How do I nurture myself when I don't remember when the last time I've ever felt nurtured? I've been divorced after a long term codependent…

Jan 21 •

#nojs-banner { position: fixed; bottom: 0; left: 0; padding: 16px 16px 16px 32px; width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box; background: red; color: white; font-family: -apple-system, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, "Apple Color Emoji", "Segoe UI Emoji", "Segoe UI Symbol"; font-size: 13px; line-height: 13px; } #nojs-banner a { color: inherit; text-decoration: underline; } This site requires JavaScript to run correctly. Please turn on JavaScript or unblock scripts